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Why We Are Always Wrong – Danger Of Pre-Assumption

By Kenji Tay on

This is going to be a very long lesson, but nonetheless, very important as it affects our life as a whole. Life is not always as perfect as it seems, and not always what we think it is… so.. before you make any assumption, it is always ideal to get your facts right before dropping the bomb on any decisions…

You see, as humans, we are naturally surrounded by this wall we built around ourselves.. its call, pre-assumption. In simple terms, it is to say, we want to see it that way.. and any other things are being filtered out.

This is bad.. but everyone suffers from it… but what you can learn from.. is that by understanding and recognizing these faults at play, you can make better and wiser decisions in life.

Well.. I’ll bring my life story here.. since its my.. blog lol…

I FXXXing HATE the army – period.

With this statement, there will rise alot of anger or debate and patriotism that I don’t love my country and I don’t deserve to be a singaporean and so on and so forth…

And for old timers… those officers and warrants might say I am a loser… and see me in a different light…

So.. the pre-assumption here is:

  • Whoever hates the army don’t deserve to be a Singaporean
  • Whoever hates the army is a loser
  • Whoever hates the army is not a patriot

So.. this wall is built around them and any other things does not matter…

Unknown to them.. I was an ex regular.. and trust me.. I did everything I can for the organisation.. and if there is any ISD or government sector reading this, you can check out my records… you probably see the very best a regular can be… and I am even proud to say… You want me in your team or organization… because I am just so damn good…

So what happened ?

Before I signed the contract, I was promised to a DIS scheme, called the diploma induction scheme, a lump sum of $15,000. Come contract signing day, the officer told us that the organization has relocate the funds and no longer giving this out… so.. we won’t be getting this $15,000. The trade off however, is that our bond was reduced to 5 years instead of the usual 6 because the $15,000 was taken out.

Come 5 years later.. I wanted to move on and decided to resign from the organization.. and instead… I was told that I had to pay them about $14,000 because my bond was 6 years… No matter what I say… its useless… everything was on the dotted line…. and I have myself to blame for not reading and understanding the contract properly…

The guys with JPSDS got the $15,000 and the back payment and their bond was 6 years..

Me.. I got the back payment but without the $15,000.. and my bond was also 6 years…

The more frustrating thing is… the batch after me got the $15,000 re-instated… but they were not informed in the first place… until they signed the papers…

Is this fair to me ?

I quit the organization… because I can’t stand what they had did to me… and paid them that $14,000…

So… you can say that the army owes me a total of $29,000 of unpaid money… and if someone owes you $29,000… do you think you have every right to hate them… I believe anyone would.. unless you were born to print money..

So.. that’s my story of why I hate the army… from a top soldier to one who despise the organization..

But still.. in my heart… I would protect my country when duty calls.. not because of the army or anything associated with it.. but because my family is here.

Ok.. its a long story… one maybe not supposed to be said… but then… it gives a very strong illustration of how pre-assumption can affect our thoughts and judgement.

So… when you first heard about me saying I hate the army… you may be angry and even decide to take me to court… but when you hear the real reasons behind.. maybe.. it would change that opinion of yours…

And despite knowing how walls can affect my thoughts and judgment, I choose not to let go of this… because.. incidentally… the month after I left… the army gave all regulars an extra 1 month worth of bonus… so… ya… the army has something against me..

What you can take away from this post is.. pre-assumption is dangerous when it comes to decision making… and it affects one from going forward… I’ll just give another example for takeaways..

All arabs are terrorist (Not True and Totally Absurd)… a very controversial but yet very dangerous pre-assumption thoughts… – This is just for illustration purpose only..

So… when you have that wall built around you, anything else doesn’t matter… relate this to one story below..

An Arab guy came running to you and shouting in a language you don’t know…

and because you had this pre-assumption built in, you start to have your guard up and shouted back at him…

because of the language barrier and you not responding, he grabs you by the collar and shouted even louder… and.. at this point of time… you, out of anger and fear, hit him and beat him up…

Unknown to you, he is actually telling you that his wife is about to give birth and is in labor pain just a street away… and he is seeking for help…

Unknown to you, he is actually an oil tycoon, with over 5 billion in net worth…

and… you beat him up…

Pretty sad… but… you just lost 5 million dollars worth of thank you gifts…

My Life No comments yet

Discovering My Childhood – Old Old Pictures

By Kenji Tay on

How many of us actually remembers our childhood ? Well… its funny… when you were young… you always wanted to be a grown up… whereas… when you grew up.. you always wanted to be young again.

In my opinion, its all part of a learning curve in life… since you never knew how blissful it is to be a children.. no worries and lots of playtime… but the only thing missing.. is that you don’t get to do a lot of stuff you want… such as buying stuff you want… eating the food you want.. and going places you want.

haha… I guess its best to stay young and rich ya ?

I kindda found this in my old photo album… yes.. that was the cheeky old me in the background… with 2 of my best childhood buddies.. one of them my cousin and the one on top.. my elder brother.

We grew up together and form this really good bond that we used to call ourselves the “Forever 3″… its cute and innovative growing up and trying to be special.

How many of us actually kept in touch with out childhood friends and buddies ?

I know I miss my childhood days much, because it is really a special bond between the 3 of us… although it kindda “died off” over time as we get busy with our own time and life.

and from these pictures… I suddenly realize that I was really a very “attention seeking” and playful kid when I was younger… haha.. unlike now… always trying to act cool and all..

Life experiences shapes a person… for the good… or for the bad, its actually a choice you make for yourself.

My Rants No comments yet

This Is Your Life… What Have You Got To Lose ?

By Kenji Tay on

Are you in control of yourself ? Or are you playing the usual blame game ? you know, its easy to put the fault on someone or something just to seek excuses in failures.

Seriously, you are in control of your own life, you dictate what you want to do with it and how you want to live it. I’ve seen many people who live their lives in the shadow of other people’s opinion. I’m sick and tired of it… and I certainly don’t want you to be in that position.

Whose life is it… is it yours.. or is it theirs. If you succeed, they come crowding over you… if you fail.. they’ll tell you that they told you so.. but here is what I think…

What have you got to lose ? Yes… you may or will eventually fail and lose what you’ve started… but the memory of starting it and having it… isn’t that memory worth more than not having it at all ?

Is there a “sure win” opportunity or secret to everything ? No… but if you don’t move out and go experience it… how do you know that it will work ??

Which is more blissful … to marry because you felt he was the one… or to marry because your parents or friends tells you to ?

But even so… Is marriage a sure thing ? If it is.. then why do we see so many “made in heaven” marriage ended up in divorce… but even then… the first reason to getting married… is probably the better choice even if it did not end well…

Whose life is it… you decide…

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Angkor Wat Tourism – A Trip Into The Khmer Empire

By Kenji Tay on

Angkor Wat Temple

The Angkor Wat Temple is the best preserved temple in the Angkor area. Built in the 12th century by King Suryavarman II. It is dedicated to the the Hindu God Vishnu and is Cambodia’s prime attraction for tourism. The design of the temple is set to represent Mount Meru, which is the home of the hindu gods. Located in Siem Reap, it is the symbol of cambodia and also one of the greatest architectural buildings ever constructed.

You all know me, I love travelling around the world and visiting all the wonders and heritage of different countries. Angkor Wat is defintely one of the MUST.

Took flight from Singapore into this history and culture rich state of Cambodia. The sad thing is, the flight was delayed for a full 3 hours.. talk about ruining a perfect vacation… hah

I was pleasantly surprise at the warmth of the welcome in Cambodia. The people there really gives you a sense of “importance” with their greetings and I must say, that quickly erase all the flight delaying issue.

Climbing The Steps Of Angkor TempleWe bought a 2 day pass to enter the Angkor site. Angkor Wat, the most famous temple of them all, is only one of many temples we see around the site. That is to say, with the day pass, you can visit unlimited amount of temples within the Angkor site and these will include The Bayon Temple, Terrance of the Elephants and the Ta Prohm, a temple made famous by the movie tomb raider.

Do note however, that the temple are NOT located closely with each other, you might need to hire a taxi to get you between temples. The good thing is, the prices of these transportation is highly affordable and you may even hire a driver for the entire day while you map out the places of which you wanted to visit. In fact, you may even choose to ride on an elephant while going up some of the routes towards the temple !

One more trip pointer to take into consideration… the steps are steep and unusually high. You will be surprise how difficult it is to move up and down the temple steps… a little frightening and a little exciting. You have to see to believe it.

The weather over there is rather humid, so I would suggest that you bring along pleanty of water as you go along touring the sites. There are lots of handicrafts made by the locals that you can buy as a gift to your friends and family back in your hometown. The gifts are cheap and it is their source of income to make a living. In fact, you might even see children as young as 6 years old trying to sell you one of them. If you do have change, it would be nice to purchase a gift or 2. After all, it does not cost more than a dollar and does set its exclusivity as a handicraft of the locals.

After all the walking and climbing, you might want rest your feet and body at the service of a masseur before ending your day at a local restaurant.

Ta Prohm Temple aka Tomb Raider Temple

If there is one thing that is keeping this tourism market going, it is the history, culture and beautifully preserved buildings that is drawing visitors to boost the country’s economy. Though much is spend on the preservation of this history rich temples, no leverage is being done on the profits earned through tourism to boost the overall economy of the country.

The Angkor Wat Tourism market is uniquely low keyed as compared to other holiday destinations that features theme parks and stuffs.

Set in a laid back village setting, as simple as they may be, the people over there in Cambodia really gives their best to make you feel special and that alone really sets the tone away from the busy and hectic city life.

By the way, stay around for the sun set, you will get a stunning and romantic feel around angkor wat temple. You are probably in for a surprise of the magical sensation and colour that surrounds it…